heart of the city

"In time she'll mature n be all she can be lik the reserves"
Lost One by Jay Z
Through my days I struggle wit the concept of the future. I'm not sure of it at all to be honest. I wonder wat it holds for me n wat can I achieve if I apply myself. Everybody expects greatness from me n I can feel the pressure. I wake up everyday wit a terrible attitude n a fuck off writtin across my face. After my shower n music that I can relate too I get in my let's get it mood. People can't normally tell how I feel or wats on my mind cuz I'm pretty consistent wit actions n sayins. I was talkin to a gurl I knew from lik 3 or 4yrs ago n she was askin me bout how I been n wonderin how I'm doin now n how many gurls I talk to now. I always feel that wen u haven't talk to sum1 in yrs unless u bump into each ova u shuldnt speak, don't use holidays to ignite old flames. After talkin for awhile the conversation turns sour becuase she begins to lash out at me for shit I did yrs ago. I ask myself y is she still mad bout it n y wuld u call me yrs lata n talk bout wat I did yrs ago. U knew me wen I was 16 of course I wasn't lookin for long term I was jus lookin for rite den n now. She continued n said I'm not relationship type of guy...wtf is dat? To me I'm jus not concerned wit havin a wife if I have one I do if I don't I don't. I'm so concerned about how ima finish skool n makin sure I got money. Ppl I jus wana say that unless u tryin settle down smack after college jus see who u can't spend ur time without. Don't stress over relationships there not all that unless u really find that sumbody. Focus on the things that will get u ahead n if someone catches ur attention run wit it but don't focus on it. Live love laugh.
-Alley E